#31 How to Trust Your Inner Wisdom & Watch the Energy of Others

Energy vampires

A few years back I was having a wisdom tooth pulled. I had no qualms about it. I never had a tooth pulled before, but something inside made me know it would be easy. I saw myself in and out of the dentist’s office and in good health afterward. I had meditated on it and felt really confident about the procedure.

When a friend found out what I was getting ready to do, she laughed at me for taking it in stride and even called to her husband, “Hey, Jenn’s going to get a tooth pulled and she thinks she’s going to be ok!” They both laughed. 

I was now a bit confused and cautious of what was to happen, and on her suggestion, I asked my daughter to come with me so she could drive me home afterward. After all, my friend assured me I would be in no shape to drive home myself.

My dentist, whom I’ve been going to since I was about 9, allowed my daughter to watch the whole procedure since she was going into the healthcare profession and was considering dentistry. It was a great experience for her. My dentist walked me through every step, joking during the whole procedure as usual, and ten minutes later with no swelling, I popped out of the chair and headed for home without any discomfort whatsoever.

I didn’t need my daughter to drive me home, although I let her.  Better still, she got a free lesson in a surgical procedure that would have cost a fortune in dental school. So all in all, no harm done.  I know my friend was coming from a place of personal experience and only had my best interest at heart.  But I allowed her to challenge what I already knew for sure.  I allowed her energy, her personal experiences to challenge my balance and second guess what my gut already told me was certain.  Rather than being angry with her or myself for distrusting my own inner wisdom, I learned the greater lesson of keeping the energy of others out of my space and trusting the messages my body sends me.

I’ve gotten a whole lot better at not allowing other people’s experiences and energies to affect my world, but they certainly do come fast and furious at us if we’re not paying attention.  So do yourself a favor, and set yourself up for wellness by protecting your space before you leave the house. Depending on your situation, you may even want to protect your space while you’re in your own house.  Teenage daughters and cranky husbands are quick to drain us of our energy.

Protect your own personal energy by creating an imaginary ring around yourself.  An imaginary circle that is large enough for you to spin around in with your arms out. The Flowercircle can be made up of large lovely flowers that will absorb the energy of others and keep that energy out of your space.

You can create a ring of mirrors to reflect the energy of others right back at them.  Perhaps you are getting ready to enter a difficult situation that you are not looking forward to, or you will be in the company of a strong energy force. Mirror 3

 

Surround yourself with Centurian guards dressed in heavy armor with large metal shields to protect your space.  Whatever is it, make it fun and save all your energy for yourself so only can honor and control it.

Guard

#30 Self-Talk

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Our self-talk is the creator of our universe.  It is the voice of our heart, mind, and soul, and reflects our perceptions of the world, of others, and of ourselves.  It guides us, criticizes us, supports us, and impacts our decisions. Our “inner voice” often influences our moods and determines if we are happy, sad, relaxed, worried, optimistic, or helpless. Because self-talk is the “voice” we hear most, it has more influence on us and can impact our future more than anything else.

It’s estimated that 80% of what the average person says to him/herself is harmful, pessimistic, and undermining.

Ask yourself and consider:

  • Are you willing to easily accept less than perfection from yourself?
    • Do you give yourself permission to do less than 100%?
  • What do you say to yourself when you make a mistake? Do you give yourself a hard time?
    • How can you be more compassionate with yourself?
  • Is “should” one of the most prominent words in your vocabulary? Do you hear yourself often saying, “I should be working”, “I should go on a diet”, “I should get that done”, etc.  
    • Stop shoulding on yourself!
  • Do you compliment yourself when you look in the mirror?
    • What are some lovely things you can say to yourself, even on your worst day?
  • Do you give yourself praise for your accomplishments?
    • Don’t wait for someone else to pat you on the back.  Know you are already enough. Go out and buy yourself flowers.  Don’t wait for someone to do it for you.  Show yourself that YOU love YOU!
  • Are you uncomfortable accepting compliments? Do you brush off the compliment and say something negative about yourself or give the credit to someone else?
    • Just smile and say, ‘Thank you.”
  • Do you ever say things to yourself that you would never say to a friend because it would hurt his/her feelings?
    • Speak to yourself the same way you speak to those whom you hold very near and dear to your heart.  You deserve nothing less.
  • Do you ever hear words of a critical parent, family member, teacher, or boss come out of your mouth- directed to yourself?
    • Don’t beat yourself up.  Start again.  Apologize to yourself and take a moment to think of something kind and loving to say.

Self-Talk Strategies

  1. Before reacting to the ONE thing you did not do correctly, remember the times you have been stellar today.
  2. If you “hear” a negative internal message about yourself, stop and provide a positive statement.
  3. Dropped the ball?  Let it go. Remind yourself of your true value and potential and move on.
  4. Every time you give someone a compliment, give yourself one too!
  5. Be patient.  You’re reprogramming your mind.  It takes time, but if you persist, you will be living in a new reality.  A truer reality that is not made for you but by you.

Shift work….

Choose an affirmation or two that works for you and write or type it up on beautiful pieces of paper.  Place the affirmations in areas around your home and/or workspace to act as constant reminders for you.  

I type mine up and trifold the paper into a tent and then place the tent on my bathroom sink and look at it every morning while getting ready.

I’ve even gone so far as to laminate some and hang them in the shower for my kids if I felt they needed a little help. Of course, they thought I was nuts, but it never too soon to teach your kids how to help themselves.

Weekly Self-Talk Planner Worksheet

 

#27 Affirmations

Heal

Many people have scripted our self-talk, and the good news is we can re-script it. An affirmation is a statement of fact or belief (positive or negative) that will lead toward the end result you expect.  

When feeding our minds positive affirmations the programming in our minds changes. Michael Phelps talks of this when he “goes to the video” each morning as he prepares to train.  Professional athletes and business people have used the technique of affirmations for years to increase their performance and success.

Here are some examples of affirmations created by Robert Egby, as well as some I’ve created myself.  Have fun creating some of your own.  These will get you started.  In the meantime, good luck and remember, think well and be well. I’m curious to see which one you will you choose for yourself today.   Tomorrow, expect it to be different. (HINT:  Jump to the bottom of the list for a great book tip that will help you to go even deeper with affirmations.)

  • I am positive, confident and radiate good things
  • I have energy, enthusiasm, and vitality
  • I am totally relaxed and confident. When I am relaxed I achieve more.
  • I realize that time is my most valuable resource, so I carefully use it on only what is important to me.
  • I am a professional, respected person, fully capable of earning a professional, respected income.
  • I attract success into my life.  I deserve everything that success brings.
  • I really am very special.  I like who I am and I feel good about myself.
  • I was designed and created, in body and mind, to achieve.
  • I am a person of quality and strength.  I deserve success.
  • I always look for ways I can get something done instead of finding reasons why I cannot.
  • I always listen to those around me and work to understand their needs.
  • I enjoy showing others the best of themselves.  I always accept them at their best.
  • I have strength, absolute determination, and limitless endurance in the pursuit of my goals.
  • Things for me are calm, cool, smooth, and easy.
  • Every day, in every way, I feel better and better.
  • I need to recover and rest.  Everything else can wait.
  • I am calm and confident.  I have the quiet self-assurance of winning in my life.
  • I have inner peace.  I am living my life in a positive and worthwhile way.
  • I have purpose and value in my life. I love who I am and I enjoy being me.
  • I stand in my own truth.
  • I love and accept myself completely as I am.
  • I fully love, trust, and accept myself.
  • I plan for the possibilities.
  • I am intelligent.  My mind is quick and alert and clever and fun.
  • I am strong, healthy, and full of energy.
  • I am not alone.  I have supports all around when I open my eyes and just take a look.
  • I think good thoughts, and my mind makes things work right for me.
  • I am able to see a precise picture of exactly what my goals are in everything I do and what I must do to achieve each of them.
  • Make it fun gets it done.  – Jon Acuff
  • When I am pleasing everyone, I am not honoring my truths.
  • I breathe in life and love and exhale all that no longer serves me.
  • Because winning takes energy, good health, and a strong, positive attitude, I make sure that I keep myself fit both mentally and physically.
  • I speak, think, and act from a place of grace and gratitude.
  • I take full responsibility for everything about me, even the thoughts I think.
  • I always visualize myself being at my absolute best in every part o my personal/professional life.
  • I accept where I am and all thing that brought me to this moment.
  • I learn from everything I do and everyone I meet.
  • I am filled with divine confidence to act.
  • I listen and pay attention to the signs and symbols around me.
  • My mind is clear and alert.  It is capable of meeting any challenge I place before it.
  • I have excellent powers of concentration.  I attune all my senses to the subject at hand, and I am able to focus my attention more and more easily each day.
  • My body, heart, and mind speak to me.  I listen with trust and a deep sense of knowing.
  • I have more money than I will ever need.
  • I allow the highest to occur in my life and I embrace it.
  • I am creative.  I like to find new and interesting ways to do things in my life.
  • Every day, something new and interesting happens in my life.
  • I like myself and I like my goals.  I am moving forward in my life.

TIPS:

  • You may want to get yourself a copy of Louise Hay’s book, Heal Your Body A-Z.  In addition to having beautiful artwork, each page is structured with three columns:
    • Ailments which are listed from A-Z
    • An explanation of what’s happening in your subconscious as a result of your ailment
    • An Affirmation that aids in creating a Shift in your mindset set, which will aid to rid the body of the ailment.

#2 Support System…Family and Friends

 

family

Every person managing adversity should be fortunate enough to be surrounded by compassionate and loving family and friends.  I was that lucky.  I am a mother of two wonderful children.  At the time of my diagnosis, my daughter was beginning her freshman year in high school.  My son was entering seventh grade.  Their dad was absolutely amazing managing a home, their schooling, work, and taking care of me in and out of the hospital (often times with his eyes half-open).

One piece often overlooked when one is not well, is the health and wellness of the caregivers.  They need just as much TLC because they’re burning the candle at both ends.

I am truly blessed to be surrounded by loving and supportive family and friends. Everyone from the kids’ classmates and soccer families to my parents, siblings, family friends, and neighbors took care of our children.  Thanks to the generosity of my neighborhood, we had a hot meal on our table every evening…dessert included!  What else could I ask for?  I know what, colleagues who showed their love through cards and letters, pictures and signs to hang in my hospital room and baskets and baskets of goodies. So, so, so blessed!